There’s been nothing to do for the last 18 days that we’ve been in Kuwait. We’ve done anything we can think of to make the time pass, but there’s been little success. Fortunately, MWR has kept us busy at least a few nights each week.
When I’ve talked about it on the phone, I’ve been made fun of because it sounds like I’m at a summer camp. I’ve realized that is a pretty accurate assessment of the time we’ve spent here in Kuwait. There have been some interesting experiences with the MWR events, so I thought I’d take the time to do a little recap, and hopefully provide a little humor in the fact that we’re a bunch of overgrown children. Without further ado, Summer Camp Part I - Unit Feud
I’m sure most of you remember the television game show "Family Feud." If not, here’s a brief explanation. Teams of five members all from the same family competed against each other to try to score 300 points. The first member of each team goes up to a podium, and the host asks a question like, "Name something you do at the breakfast table." 100 people were surveyed before the show, and the answers are hidden on the board.
The first one to buzz in answers first. Whichever team guesses the most often chosen response gets to decide whether to pass or play. The team that plays goes in order guessing, until they either have three strikes, or guess all of the answers on the board. If they get three strikes, the other team has a chance to steal with one answer. If they guess anything left on the board, they win the points.
Unit Feud was almost the exact same as Family Feud, only instead of being from the same family, we were from the same unit. I was on a team with a bunch of guys from Midland: Rodriguez, Dodd, Evans, and Trammell.
In Unit Feud, each round is worth 100 points regardless of how many answers are guessed. It just comes down to which team wins three rounds first.
In our first game, we quickly took a 1-0 lead, but then lost the next game to even it at 1. I was the third contestant on my team, so round three was the one when I went to the podium to try to guess the highest answer. The question: "Name something people try to fix themselves."
I buzzed in first.
Me: Their car
Host: Number one answer!
See how easy that was? We decided to play, and somehow, didn’t get a single one right after that. The other team stole and was up 2-1. Our backs were to the wall, but we weren’t going down without a fight.
We won the next two games to take the match in 5 and advance on to the semi-finals. I would go into more detail, but it all happened so fast, I don’t remember much of the first round.
In round two we again won the first game and lost the second, and it was my turn to face-off against the opposing team’s third player. The question: "Name something people do on an airplane."
I again buzzed in first.
Host: Number one answer!
We decided to play, only this time we won. The answers that I can remember us getting were, eat/drink, talk, and read. The only one that neither team guessed was chew gum, but we still got the points because they were wrong on their attempt to steal.
Round 4 was a disaster, but we came up big in the clutch again in round 5 to move on to the finals. What team would we face? TMC (Troop Medical Clinic)
We had just defeated another TMC team in the semis, so our confidence was pretty high. Little did we know the advantage they would have in crunch time.
Again, the first two games were split 1-1 and it was my turn for the face-off. The question: "Name something that has a lobby."
The girl I was going against buzzed in first and said, "an office building." The host told her she had to be more specific, and she came up with the brilliant response of, "a lawyer’s office." EEEEH! Wrong, not even on the board. It was my chance to steal.
I looked at the host and calmly said, "Hotel...number one answer," and turned around and walked back to my chair before he even acknowledged that I was correct. Sure enough, I was, and he questioned whether I had x-ray vision and could see through the card. Yeah, it was a cocky thing to do, but I knew I was right, and it gave us an edge in the intimidation factor. Oh what, you can’t even get one that’s on the board? Well I got the number one answer without even breaking a sweat. That’s right, be intimidated.
We decided to pass that one since playing hadn’t worked well for us so far. Bad idea. They got all but one, and I can’t even remember what we tried to steal with, but it wasn’t on the board, and it gave them a 2-1 lead. Once again our backs were to the wall, but we knew we’d been there before.
The next question was, "Name the worst kind of movie to see on a first date." Dodd got the higher of the two answers, and we again decided to pass. Could’ve been a bad idea, but we were sticking to our new strategy.
They guessed all but the number one answer, and we had a chance to steal. Before I go any further, let me just say that I was somewhat disturbed by the answers given. Romantic movies were ranked the third worst to see on a first date. What was the fourth you might ask? Porn. Out of 100 Americans surveyed, more would rather watch porn on a first date than a romantic movie. Could this be why the divorce rate in America is so high?
Anyway, the only genres we could even think of that were left were comedies and action movies. The obvious choice was action movies, and sure enough, it was the number one answer. We stole that round and were still alive heading into the decisive round five.
The question: "Name a part of the body that you would wrap."
Great, we’re playing a bunch of medics and they ask a medical question in the decisive round. That’s like asking us to name a professional sports team in Texas.
They got the number one answer and chose to play. Somehow, the idiots guessed ribs and head, both not on the board giving them two strikes. They had already guessed every answer but one, and we had already decided that our answer to steal was going to be hands. We just needed them to miss on their next guess.
The last medic answers, "your finger." The judges got together and we knew what was going on. At that very moment, we knew without a doubt that the last answer was hand, and they were debating whether or not to give them credit for guessing finger. They turned to us and said, "that counts!" And the medics won.
Are you kidding me? Now fingers and hands are the same thing? If I were to wrap my toes, is that the same as wrapping my foot? Can’t you cut off all of your fingers and still have a hand? Don’t try that, I’ll just tell you that the answer is a resounding YES. We were sick. How could we lose on such a ridiculous decision?
The worst part? Everyone that played was given a $10 gift card, but the winners got $25. So, we figured second place would get at least $15, if not $20. Nope, $10, just like all of the other losers.
I’m still angry about that decision. How can anyone say that wrapping your finger is the same as wrapping your hand? If I had said ankle, would they have given me hamstring? It’s an extension of my leg, why not? Unbelievable.
On a lighter note, we had a lot of fun just watching the other teams go against each other. There was one team of five women that pretty much everyone in the room wanted to kill by the time their game was over. They were so annoying. One kept saying, "time, time, time" any time someone took a second to say their answer. Then they argued anything and everything.
During a face-off, the opposing player buzzed in before the question was over because she knew the answer before hearing the whole question. When she got the number one answer, one of the annoying ladies says, "Timeout! Don’t she have to wait for the question to finish before she answer?" The host said no, and she argued for a few more minutes. Everyone in the audience chose this point to boo her like crazy, and then every time she had to do anything the rest of the game we were all booing. It was quite the spectacle.
It was like a talk show where the crowd is booing a guest and the guest gets all defensive and says something to the effect of, "You don’t know, you don’t know nothin’ bout what’s going on here." She was even doing the finger wave at us. Without a doubt, my favorite part of the night.
After they lost, they kept arguing the answers and everyone was booing insanely loud at this point, and the entire time they’re heading for the exit door. As they’re walking out, one chooses to turn off the lights in one final act of immaturity. Classy ladies. Not that we were being much more mature, but it was funny nonetheless.
So that’s Unit Feud. Tomorrow’s episode: Summer Camp Part II - Kickball